My December
by 000Mikami000
Summary: "It's sad when you lose someone important to you.The fact of not being able to see that person anymore...it never leaves you alone no matter what.The hole that's made on your chest after losing that person...is just suffocating"/Warning: Suicide


Hiii! well this is my first song-one shot :D, I'm not good at writing but I just had the need to do this o_ sorry if it ain't that good D:

If ya havent herd the song listen to it cause it's really good x3

My December by Linkin Park

enjoy UlquiGrimm fans :'D

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"_It_'_s sad...when you lose someone important to you._"

The snow slowly fell covering up everything that was in sight, proving that nothing could get away from its cold dead touch, leaving a trace of white on every living and lifeless object that it could reach. This weather gave the place a lonely atmosphere. In this place rested those who's journey had ended in the world, and they were never to wake up from they're slumber.

"_**This is my December...**_

_**This is my time of the year,**_

_**This is my December,**_

_**This is all so clear..."**_

A tall man stood there in the snow. Every breath that left his body came out meeting itself with the cold air around him. His blue eyes not breaking contact with the gravestone below him.

"_The fact of not being able to see that person anymore...it never leaves you alone no matter what."_

"_**This is my December...**_

_**This is my snow covered home,**_

_**This is my December...**_

_**This is me alone"**_

In his blue eyes there was only sadness reflected on them. Sadness for the person he had lost. Life had taken his soul away even if it wasn't his turn to move on to the next life. This happened because of a foolish man's cause. That man had made the young boy's heart stop, piercing it with a bullet from the gun he weld. Such man was punished, his life was also taken. But it was not meant to happen to _him_. That boy had a whole life ahead. He had done nothing wrong to deserve such faith. But death had claimed his life against his will. Death plays by its own rules. And such rules are to be followed.

"_The hole that_'_s made on your chest after losing that person...is just suffocating"_

"_**And I...**_

_**Just wished that**_

_**I didn't feel like there was something I missed...**_

_**"And I…**_

_**take back all the things**_

_**I said to make you feel like that…"**_

Memories of both of them appeared in his head. Every single memory was precious to him. From the day they both met, to the day they're bodies became one. He remembered how they always used to argue about everything...At first they even hated each other. _Him_ with his emotionless "know it all" attitude, and Grimmjow with his careless intimidating wild personality. They were so different...

* * *

_-"Grimmjow"- he spoke softly while the blue haired man turned around to face him.-"How do you know when you love someone?"-he asked in a low voice._

_Grimmjow looked at him slightly confused-"You just feel it I guess…"-Was his reply. He didn't know what to say. He was never good at explaining things. Ulquiorra just stood there without saying a word. Grimmjow just looked at him trying to find words to explain his question.-"Well…" -He scratched the back of his head and he let out a small sight before continuing.-"You always think about that person. Always want to see that person happy and not get hurt "-He paused for a moment-"And you just want to be with that person always. That's what I think."-He finished._

_-"I see…"_

* * *

"_**And I…**_

_**just wished that**_

_**I didn't feel like there was something I missed"**_

"_**And I…**_

_**Take back all the things**_

_**I said to you…"**_

Grimmjow let out a small chuckle- "You always tried to find an explanation to things no matter how simple they were..."-He spoke softly- " You idiot..."

It was so weird the fact of how two completely different people were perfect for each other. They were like the Sun and Moon. Neither of them could exist without the other.

A small sad smile appeard on his face.

The first time they kissed. The first time he saw _him_ smile. The first time he cried in front of _him_. The first time he heard those words he always wanted to hear come out of _his_ pale mouth. He remembered everything. And yet having all those memories was so painful, because he knew that he could never make new ones with _him_ anymore.

"_**And I,**_

_**Give it all away,**_

_**Just to have somewhere to go to,**_

_**Give it all away..."**_

The smile faded, and the feeling of sadness was replaced with something more.

"_**To have someone to come home to..."**_

- "I hate you..."- he hissed slowly - "I fucking hate you..."- Sadness was replaced with hate. - "You think you can just say those damn words and leave me here like an idiot huh?-he shouted.-"Well fuck you!

He stopped for a moment and slowly began calming himself.

-"…It's my fault"-He whispered-"It's my god damn fault…"

"_**This is my December..."**_

_He hated him and he hated himself_

"_**These are my snow covered trees"**_

_He hated that he had abandoned him and he hated himself for letting him go_

"_**This is me pretending..."**_

_It was his entire fault_

"_**This is all I need"**_

He fell to his knees punching the soft white ground below him. – "Fuck!"-Tears began forming in his hated _him _so much...because he loved _him_. And it was his fault he died. He had to protect him, and he didn't.

"_I love you"_

-"Why?"-he asked knowing no one would answer him. Tears now running down his cold skin. He hated those words. Ever since life had taken _him_ away, they always used to echo in his head. It was so suffocating. They never left him alone.

"_**And I...**_

_**Just wished that**_

_**I didn't feel like there was something I missed**_

_**And I…**_

_**Take back all the things**_

_**I said to make you feel like that…"**_

He knew that he would never get to see those emerald eyes anymore. Never touch that pale cold skin...never see his smile... That smile he loved so much. He felt like if someone was cutting off his oxygen. Breathing suddenly became harder because of the pain he was feeling in his chest.

"_**And I...**_

_**Just wished that**_

_**I didn't feel like there was something I missed**_

"_**And I…**_

_**Take back all the things**_

_**I said to you…"**_

A long scream made its way out of his throat.

"_**And I**_

_**Give it all away,**_

_**Just to have somewhere to go to...**_

_**Give it all away,**_

_**To have someone to come home to..."**_

_He couldn't kiss him anymore..._

_He couldn't feel him anymore..._

_He was just gone..._

* * *

_-"Grimmjow…do you believe in life after death?"- Ulquiorra suddenly asked while resting his head on Grimmjow's shoulder._

_Grimmjow didn't move and just stared at the sunset in front of them.-"Who knows…but I really don't care."-he answered calmly._

_-"Why is that?"_

_-"I don't like thinking of it, all that crap of heaven and hell, I don't give a shit about it"-Ulquiorra remained silent for a few seconds and was ready to say something but was cut off by Grimmjow-"But if heaven really existed…"-He looked at Ulquiorra and gave a warm smile-"I'd say I'm already there if your here with me."-Ulquiorra's emerald eyes winded in surprise and a faint blush came across his face but he turned his head slightly away to avoid Grimmjow seeing it. Grimmjow let out a small laugh at this._

_They both remained silent one next to the other just looking at the colorful sky._

_-"So what would happen if I died?"-The raven haired boy asked. Grimmjow remained silent while he slowly turned over to look at Ulquiorra directly at his emerald eyes._

_-"Then I'd die too. Because if you died, living would be fucking Hell for me"-He said-"But don't you even think of dying. Because I won't let any damn thing happen to you, so don't say crap like that"_

_"…"__-Ulquiorra felt happy. Happy for having someone care so much for him.-"Thank you…Grimmjow"_

* * *

Moments later the tears stopped, and silence once again took over. His eyes were covered with a shadow and he just remained silent without movement. He was a broken man. Whoever would have looked at Grimmjow would have compared him to an agonizing animal, waiting for death to put it out of its suffering. It's even a surprise for Grimmjow of how he had changed so much ever since he had met _him_. Before, he was considered as a strong fearless man. And now he felt like the complete opposite. He felt weak, vulnerable and lost.

"_**This is my December,**_

_**This is my time of the year,**_

_**This is my December...**_

_**This is all so clear"**_

"_I love you Grimmjow_"

Those words once again echoed in his head. - "Shut up..."-was his only reply. He slowly led his hand into his black coat and took out a familiar object, the same cause of death of his lover. He slowly took it up to his head.

"_**Give it all away...**_

_**Just to have somewhere to go to"**_

Not having him here was like having a knife pierced in his heart. Or the place where his heart used to be.

He could hear death laughing at him. Grimmjow knew that only _it_ could decide when his time came. He was breaking the rules, but he didn't care. Nothing cared anymore...

All he wanted...

"_**Give it all away..."**_

"_I love you Grimmjow_"

Was too see him once more

"_I love you...Ulquiorra_"

"_**To have someone to come home to..."**_

A loud sound echoed across the cemetery and the snow slowly began taking a red color underneath.

His vision was slowly fading away. But something called his attention. He looked up and saw a familiar figure that was looking at him from a small distance across the snow, they're eyes making contact. He had a sad look on his pale face. The dark haired figure whispered something, but Grimmjow couldn't hear it because his blue eyes couldn't fight to stay open anymore.

One final tear fell down his cheek until it reached the ground and froze, along with his body. White was replaced with red. And life was replaced with death.

**END**

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Well that's all :D, please review D:

bye!


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